您上次给配偶或伴侣写一封情书是什么时候?
我在那里听到板球。空白的沉默。
If you can’t remember the last loveletter you wrote, or if you’ve never hand-written a love letter (with an actual pen and paper), it’s not surprising.
在这个即时交流时代,老式的情书似乎是古老而效率低下的。
Why cramp your fingers writing a letter when you can strengthen your thumbs with a quick text? “ILY, babe. UR awesome. (Heart emoji, smiling cat face emoji).”
Nothing expresses your heartfelt devotion like an electronic message, right?
Sarcasm aside, writing a love letter to your beloved the old-fashioned way — with a pen, in longhand, on a piece of stationery — is one of the most loving gestures you can offer.
为什么你应该写一封情书
There are many benefits to writing a love letter by hand to your partner or spouse:
- 写作a letter by hand shows you care enough to take the time and thought involved in crafting something for your partner.
- 写出自己的感受使您可以与伴侣更加开放和脆弱,从而增强您的亲密和爱。
- Hand writing a letter forces you to slow down and carefullyconsider your wordsto better express your true feelings.
- 手写字母是romantickeepsake gift your partner will cherish for years.
- 写作a letter by hand with your thoughts and feelings will make you a better verbal communicator with your partner.
According to research conducted by relationship expert and author, Dr. John Gottman, the ratio of positive interactions to negative interactions with your partner has to be greater than five to one for your relationship to be happy and healthy.
换句话说,您需要五个积极的,爱心的遭遇来减轻每一个负面的遭遇。
但是,我们倾向于在我们的关系中自满,尤其是在负面事件之后。
我们常常无法发起任何有意义的积极相遇 - 少五个。
写情书是消除您与您所爱的人之间产生的冲突和误解的完美方法。
How to Write a Love Letter
Of course, a love letter should be your own words and express the sentiments that reside in your heart.
But it can be daunting to organize those sentiments in a way that best expresses them in writing.
Here are some ideas to help you:
Make it just long enough.
情书不必长时间才能有效和有意义。它只需要发自内心,具体和真实。
Have a goal in mind.
It’s also nice to have a goal in mind whenwriting your letter。Think about what you want to express and how you want your partner to feel when reading the letter.
Make it about your partner.
Try not to use a love letter for any ulterior motives or manipulative goals. This letter should be all about your partner and your positive feelings for him or her.
Begin with the purpose.
Let your beloved know at the beginning of the letter that you are writing to express your love and gratitude.
“This morning I felt compelled to write to you, as I was flooded with my deep feelings of love for you and gratitude that you are my wife.”
包括积极记忆。
As a transition in the letter, you might write about a happy, positive memory of the two of you.
“I’ve been thinking about our first real date when we hiked together and how I felt immediately connected to you and your love of nature.”
Detail what you love about him or her.
Now you can show your partner that your love is grounded in the qualities you see in him or her. Talk about some of those qualities and what they mean to you.
“你是我所认识的最善良,最富有同情心的人,尽管你很聪明,但你永远不会让别人感到很小。”
How has your partner made you better?
After listing some of your partner’s amazing qualities, let him or her know how you’ve been changed for the better by these qualities.
“Your compassion and kindness have made me more loving, patient, and empathetic. Your integrity is often my ballast when I lose my cool.”
Emphasize your commitment.
Let our spouse or partner know that you are in it for the long haul. Your commitment is solid and so is your love.
“I love you so much and can’t imagine my life without you. I want to be by your side forever.”
Close with a bang.
当您关闭这封信时,说一些话可以概括您对男孩或女孩的感受的力量。
“每天早晨,当我醒来看到你旁边的你的脸时,我都知道一切都与世界有关。你是我一生的爱,你使我比以往任何时候都更快乐。”
如果您需要更多的灵感,我将编写一些情书示例和样式来帮助您。
6个情书的例子和样式
1.“让我告诉你我有多爱你”信
这封信是为了表达您对伴侣的感受的力量。
You want him or her to know without a doubt that you are head over heelsin loveor that your love is deep and abiding (for long-term relationships).
Need some ideas? Take a look at these quotes:
- “当我看见你时,我害怕见到你。当我met you I was afraid to kiss you. When I kissed you, I was afraid to love you. Now that I love you, I am afraid to lose you.” -Anonymous
- “You have bewitched me, body and soul, and I love … I love … I love you. I never wish to be parted from you from this day on.” -Darcy (Matthew MacFadyen) to Elizabeth (Keira Knightley) in Pride and Prejudice
- “I love you without knowing how, or when, or from where. I love you straightforwardly, without complexities or pride; so I love you because I know no other way.” -Pablo Neruda
- “我爱你,不仅是因为你是什么,而且是我和你在一起的时候。”- 罗伊·克罗夫特(Roy Croft)
- “I love you, with no beginning, no end. I love you as you have become an extra necessary organ in my body. I love you as only a girl could love a boy. Without fear. Without expectations. Wanting nothing in return, except that you allow me to keep you here in my heart, that I may always know your strength, your eyes, and your spirit that gave me freedom and let me fly.” -Coco J.Ginger
2. The “You Are Amazing” Love Letter
The purpose of this letter is to let your partner know how much you admire him or her and why you feel this way.
您希望您的伴侣了解您看到并承认他或她的良好素质,并且您欣赏与已婚或与之相关的独特人物。
In this letter, give some specific examples to reinforce what you are expressing and to show you are paying attention.
以下是一些开始这封信的方法的例子:
- 当我看到对我和其他人的友善和给予您的友善时,我感到谦卑和惊讶。你是我认识的最好的人。
- You are the most honest, ethical man, and I am so proud of the way you handled that situation at work. You inspire me.
- 昨晚晚餐时,您是如此优雅和美丽。我无法让我的视线远离你。不是我想。
- I am in awe of the father you are to our children. You constantly amaze me with your patience and love for them.
3。The “I’m A Better Person Because of You” Love Letter.
有了这封情书,您希望您的伴侣知道他或她如何帮助您成为一个更好的人。
You want your partner to know how he or she has changed your life, helped you grow, inspired you, healed you, expanded you, and fulfilled you.
For example:
- 当我think back on the man I was before I met you, I don’t recognize myself. Your love has completely transformed me.
- 你的爱和信任我让我大力开展ve more than I ever believed possible. I could never have done it without your support.
- Because you are so accepting and open, I feel completely safe and loved. I have never felt so cherished as I do with you.
- I never knew that I could be so happy. Your love for me has completely changed my life.
4. The “Remember When” Love Letter
您想在这封信中借鉴积极,快乐的记忆,以便与伴侣重新点燃美好的感觉。将记忆记住是一种使它们新鲜的好方法。
Read Related:How to Apologize Sincerely
When you write down your memory, you not only relive it yourself, but also you allow your partner to experience the joy of the memory and the pleasure of knowing you took the time to relive it again.
Try to write down as much detail as you can remember, highlighting not only your feelings, but also the sights, smells, sounds, and tastes of the experience.
Here are some ideas to kick off a letter like this:
- This morning I was thinking about the first time we made love and how natural it was for both of us. I thought I’d be nervous, but I felt so comfortable in your arms.
- Do you remember that weekend we spent in Vermont a few years ago when you told me you were pregnant? I will never forget the beautiful look on your face or how in love with you I felt at that moment — and ever since.
- I remember every detail about the first time I met you. I knew the moment I saw you that we would be together.
- 当我think back over our lives together, my happiest memories are just sitting with you, talking and laughing.
5.The “I’m So Grateful” Love Letter
表达谢意对您的伴侣表示对他或她的尊重和价值。
更好的是研究已经表明,对彼此表示持续赞赏的夫妇更有可能保持承诺。
A love letter can be a permanent record of your appreciation for your partner. By writing your grateful feelings, you will experience the feelings of gratitude more profoundly than you might just speaking the words.
If you want to really hone in on what makes you feel grateful toward your partner, consider what your life would be like without him or her. What would you miss? What would you have to now handle? How would you be different?
这是一些想法:
- I was thinking this morning about all that you do to take care of our family. I know your days at the office are long and tiring, and I’m so thankful to you for the hard work you do to provide for us.
- Have I told you lately how much I感谢您对待我妈妈的方式和爸爸?您对他们是如此友善和爱,我无法告诉您这对我意味着多少。
- 感谢您今天早上为我修理早餐。您为我做的小事情向我展示了您爱我,我从不认为它们是理所当然的。
- 今天早上我去上班时,我看着我们的院子,这绝对很漂亮。您为保持这种方式做了很多艰苦的工作,我希望您知道我每天都注意到它。谢谢!
Read Related: 10 Conflict Resolution Skills For Having A “Good” Fight
6. The “Love Poem” Love Letter
如果您具有文字的创造力(或者即使您不言语),那么向您的心爱的人写一首爱情诗可能是一种有趣的,特别是有意义的表达自己的方式。
首先考虑一下您想交流的内容以及您对该主题的感受。开始集思广益,表达或反映这些感觉的单词和短语。如果卡住,请使用词库。
您可以对自己的诗变得认真或幽默。您不必押韵,除非它自然使用您使用的单词。不用担心这首诗是好是坏。正如奥斯卡·王尔德(Oscar Wilde)曾经说过的那样:“所有不好的诗歌都来自真实的感觉。”
The important point is that you made an effort to speak from your heart and create a poem for the one you love.
Here are a few poems to inspire you:
哦,亲爱的,鲁米
Oh Beloved,
take me.
Liberate my soul.
Fill me with your love and
从两个世界中释放我。
如果我除了你以外的任何事情
let fire burn me from inside.
Oh Beloved,
take away what I want.
Take away what I do.
Take away what I need.
Take away everything
that takes me from you.
How Do I Love You, by Mary Oliver
我如何爱你?
哦,那种方式。
Oh, happily. Perhaps
我可能会详细说明
示范?喜欢
this, and
like this and
no more words now
I Love You, by Carl Sandburg
我爱你,但我爱你
yet more for what you are going to be.
I love you not so much for your realities
as for your ideals.
I pray for your desires, that they may be great,
rather than for your satisfactions,
which may be so hazardously little.
A satisfied flower is one whose petals are about to fall.
But the most beautiful rose is one, hardly more than a bud,
欲望的狂暴和狂喜在哪里起作用
for larger and finer growth.
Not always shall you be what you are now.
您将朝着伟大的事物迈进。
I am on the way with you
and therefore I love you.
If you’d like to read more love poems for inspiration, check out the bookThe 100 Best Love Poems of All Time 。
关于写情书的最后一句话。。。
Write your letteron nice stationery or a beautiful card, rather than on a piece of notebook paper or the back of an envelope. You want your letter to be a keepsake that looks special.
Read the letter several times在将其交给伴侣进行编辑之前,请确保您对所说的话感觉很好。您甚至可以大声读取自己,以确保听起来像您。
等待一个小时or so before you give the letter to your beloved. You may think of more you want to say or something you wish to change.
把信放在一个特殊的地方where your partner will be surprised when he or she finds it. The surprise factor adds to the joyful experience for you and your partner.
Keep writing.Don’t make this a one-off endeavor. Consider writing a love letter a week or every two weeks. You may find your partner is inspired to write back to you.
感谢您分享有关情书的甜蜜文章,我真的很喜欢它的出色工作。
What a lovely blog thanks for sharing.